Black Paper Moon
by nicluvly
Summary: AU. A Christmas vacation for medical student, Hermione, turns her life upside down when she discovers a fataly injured Severus. The encounter awakens not only Hermione's dormant power but uncovers one of wizarding kinds dirties secrets.
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter One **

Snow drifted from the stone gray sky, stray flakes falling onto Hermione's windshield melted, smearing the landscape beyond it into a blurred kaleidoscope.

_I hope it doesn't snow too hard. _She fretted, silently.

Another bend in the road and a cabin came into view; a low one story stone building surrounded by frosted fields and a yard partitioned by stone walls and framed by the looming monolith of blue-white mountains in the distance. Hermione pulled up the gravel drive just as the snow picked up. She furrowed her brows at the absence of other vehicles and unhooked her seatbelt. Grabbing her duffle bag from the passenger seat, she swung open her car door. Outside the car, snow was blurring everything in a haze of white. Hermione hurried into the house, lest she become soaked through by the strengthening storm.

Inside, the interior was dim but the crackle and pop of a fire could be heard in the next room.

As Hermione shred her winter coat she called out, "Hello?"

There was no reply as her voice echoed off the entry way.

She padded down the hall, flipping on lights flooding the small living room and hall with light. It off set some of her ill ease. It was childish really but it helped her peace of mind. She continued through the house into the kitchen. The harsh electrical lights hummed as they came to life seemingly juxtaposed in the rustic kitchen. Her eyes were drawn to the modern fridge, on which was a note pinned by a magnet. Hermione spotted her mother's hand writing from across the room and striding over, she plucked the letter from the fridge. It read:

_Hermione,_

_Dad and I went to the village to do some last minute Christmas shopping back soon._

_Lots of love,_

_Mom_

_P.S. _

_If we're not back in time for dinner there's some soup in the fridge, just heat it up in the microwave. _

Hermione smiled before folding up the note and meandering back into the hallway. At the end of the hall there were two bedrooms, glancing into the larger of two, on the left, Hermione saw her parents luggage and took the one directly across from it for her own. It was tiny, consisting of only a single bed and dresser. She tossed her bag onto the end of the bed and sat down beside it.

While staring out across the snowy landscape outside the window, Hermione let her mind wander. _Maybe I should have put off that research paper, professor said it could wait until after Christmas break. Now I've missed time with Mom and Dad and we see little enough of each as it is. _She Sighed. _What am I thinking, of course it couldn't wait then I wouldn't have had time to triple check my references. I could have brought my laptop to the cabin and worked on it here though. _She cast about for an electrical outlet. _Perhaps not…_ Hermione shook herself and settled on unpacking things instead of worrying over the-could-have-beens.

Once he clothes were unpacked and settled in the proper drawers, Hermione removed her text book and laptop and snuggled into one of the leather couches beside the roaring fireplace in the living room. For several hours, the only sound in the cabin was the crackle of the fire place and the turning pages. It wasn't until she was interrupted by the shrill ring of her cell phone that Hermione was drawn back to the present. She fished her phone from her pocket and answered.

"Hello?"

Her shoulders relaxed upon hearing her mother's voice on the other line.

"Mom, I was just wondering where you got to-"

"Oh…" She frowned.

"No, it can't be helped."

"I don't mind really, it's not as if you can control the weather."

"I'll be fine on my own. I'm by the fire and by morning the plow will have come through and we together in time for Christmas Dinner."

"No, I'll wait to decorate the tree with you just like always."

"Mhm."

"Love you too."

Hermione disconnected the call and leaned back staring at the ceiling for a few minutes. _I knew I shouldn't have waited until Christmas Eve to come. _The fire sizzled having died down to a few glowing embers. _May as well build the fire back up. _She glanced towards the empty fire wood basket. _I'll have to get some more fire wood though. _She slid off her comfy chair and shimmied into her house slippers and headed for the entry way.

Outside, the storm had picked up; the wind whipped her hair across her face and stung her formerly warm skin. Her breath came out in clouds hallowing around her head as she trudged around to the back of the house where she had noticed a wood pile. She passed her car and noting the banks of snow building up around the tires and on the hood, no wonder her parents were snowed out for the night. She hoped the snowplow came out early in the morning, something about being trapped, alone, out in the country made her feel… not scared necessarily, few things scared her, just uneasy like something was bound to happen.

The wood pile was leaning against the house with a shawl of snow covering it. Hermione was selecting a few choices pieces when a pop, like a back firing engine, rent the silent night air. Startled, Hermione whirled in place dropping her load of wood onto the ground with a dull thud.

_Was that a gunshot or a car engine? But this far out in the country? _

Hermione steadied her breathing and a grabbed a log off the ground. It wouldn't do much against a gun but it was better than facing a threat unprepared. Hermione edged around the cabin and towards the front of the house, the snow was pristine and all was quiet but for her own labored breathing and the steady howl of the wind. Cursing her nerves, she turned back to the wood pile when she saw a black mass lying on the ground. And then it stirred and her heart sped up its frightened pace. One pale hand clutched at the snow and from beneath it an alarming red stain was growing. It was a person, paying no mind to how they got there at this time of night in this storm; Hermione cast aside the log and ran to help.

"Are you hurt? I'm a doctor."_ Almost. _She chided herself mentally. "I can help..."

The man, she could see that clearly when his profile turned towards her, stared at her through dark curtain of hair and black eyes widened in shock. He was sheet pale as Hermione assisted him to roll over; the bleeding was coming from a wound on his leg. She tried rolling up the pant leg and he hissed in pain as she revealed a gash on his thigh.

_I have to get him inside and call an ambulance._

"Sir, can you stand? We need to get you out of this storm."

He didn't respond and she was concerned from the force of his trembles he would go into shock if not hypothermia.

His mouth downturned as he attempted to speak but nothing comprehensible came out all she could make out was a strangled "Lilly?" before he lost consciousness.

* * *

><p>A gothic castle emerged through the flurry of snow just as a hooded figure appeared outside the iron gates followed by two others who manifest from thin air.<p>

"W-w-what are w-w-we g-going to t-t-e-ell the dark lord?" The shortest and roundest of them sniveled.

"I am not going to tell him anything, it was not _my doing, _Pettigrew." A second said, loftily.

"Shut up both of you," A woman snapped. "I'll report to my lord, myself." She stomped past the two of them and up towards the castle.

"How brave of you, Bellatrix, surely telling the dark lord of the missions failure will reflect poorly upon _you." _The tallest man remarked snidely as he strode beside her.

She stopped and turned to the other two, and though he couldn't see her through the flurry of snow or the pressing darkness, they all knew she was scowling at him.

"Pettigrew, this was your mistake, you must tell the dark lord." Bellatrix pointed at Pettigrew.

"M-m-my m-mistake, n-n-no!" Pettigrew stuttered as he halted in his tracks.

"It was _you;_ if you had killed Black, when you had the chance, the day would have been won and the rebel threat, a distant memory." The second man scoffed.

They continued their harried pace towards the castle.

"W-w-hat about S-s-severus?" Pettigrew scrambled to keep up with the other two who seemed to levitate over the snow while he fought every snow drift.

"Severus was taken, isn't it obvious? That is why you will report to the dark lord." Bellatrix sneered over her shoulder as they reached the double doors of the castle.

Before Pettigrew could make further protest, a chill voice cut through the silent hall as they entered.

"What?"

The three fell to their knees. Lord Voldemort loomed over them, glaring at each in turn. "You left with four and return to me three, where is Severus?"

No one answered but the howl of the wind in the distance.

"Lucius?"

The second man raised his head to his master. "We're sorry, master, Severus has been taken by the rebels, they have…"

"Have what?" Voldemort prompted icily.

"Dumbledore has return, my lord," Bellatrix interrupted, "and he has the Longbottom boy with him."

There was a lengthy silence in which the three feared in which direction their master's mercurial mood would sway.

"It seems the 'Chosen One' has arrived at last." Voldemort said with a sinister laugh.


	2. Chapter 2

** Chapter Two:**

The wind howled echoing across the valley and Hermione's cool was dissolving like the snowflakes falling on her and this injured man. He'd lost consciousness. Not good. Hermione fumbled in her pocket and extracted her keys, and dangling from a chain on said keys was a miniature pocket knife. She click open the blade before hacking at the hem of her shirt beneath her coat.

One long strip from around her midriff was enough to tie around the man's thigh and stop the bleeding, for now. The next thing would be to get him inside, ideally she would have checked him for other injuries but the elements were against them. Hermione arranged his limbs as best she could, brushing back tendrils of her hair that were damp from the snow and sweat.

_I need to move faster before we both freeze to death. _

Hermione squatted down beside him, if only she were stronger she could hoist him over her shoulders or carry him, at this rate she would be forced to drag him by the arm pits. Then inspiration struck, there was still the quilt from her bed if she could roll him onto it she could use it like a makeshift sled.

Hermione removed her coat and draped it over him then ran back to the house.

Rolling him onto the blanket was the easy part; the hardest part was getting him into the house. Huffing, panting and blessing her gym membership, Hermoine managed to get the injured man into the cabin and before the fire. It was impossible for her to lift him onto the couch, under her own strength. Instead, she settled him beside the dying embers of her fire.

_I'll need to build up the fire, _she worried, _but first I should check him for anymore wounds._

In the dim light of the cabin, Hermione scanned over the injured man there was no obvious signs of injury but he was soaked through and shivering convulsively.

_I have to get him warm. _She cast about. _First things first I'll get these wet clothes off of him. _

His attire was… strange, he wore a black ankle length robe over a pair of black slacks and black shoes. She turned him a little wary of his injury and any searching for any other injury she could have overlooked when she noticed his hand was clutching a stick like a life-line.

"You're going to have to let go of that, I can't get your sleeve past it," she said soothingly as she massaged his fingers trying to coax them to let go of whatever it was he was holding onto so tightly.

He wouldn't relax his hand and she was forced to pry his hand open. Finally, she wrenched his fingers back and removed the polished shaft her fingers brushed against it and a shock rippled up her spine. Hermione stumbled back falling on her haunches. The stick rolled away under the coffee table.

Half remembered images flashed behind her eyes, several men with blurred faces, Hermione, as a child, crying; she hadn't meant to do it; it was an accident; she was sorry! Then everything went black.

Hermione gasped as phantom tears slid down her cheek. She pressed her finger tips to her lashes. What was that? A memory. But of what? She tried chasing its source but it was lost like a vapor on the wind. As strange as it was, there was no time to wonder about it. His wound still needed a proper dressing and he needed to get warm at dry.

However, despite her convictions, Hermione's hands hovered over his body, unwilling to pull the clothes off the icompasitated man, it was silly, childish really, but she'd never undressed a man before and she just never imagined the first time would be… well, this way.

_Get a grip, this is a man's life not some harlequin romance. _

She took off his cloak first, tossing it into a pile by the fire; she would dry it properly later. Next his undershirt, that too was added to the pile. Last were his pants. She paused momentarily above his fly before charging forward, shamefully looking the other way as she tugged his pants on his slender legs.

Hermione cast the pants aside and stood over the prone man, in just his underwear –she couldn't bear to strip him nude- he seemed so… fragile. She wondered briefly what he could be doing out in the middle of the country without any conveyance and how he'd sustained his injuries. But the sight of the blood blooming on the makeshift bandage jerked her back to the task at hand.

After grabbing several couch blankets and pillows making him as comfortable as possible, she ran back out into the storm; she had a first aid kit out in her car.

The storm had only worsened and she could hardly see her car parked a few feet away. She fought through the storm and dug through the pile of snow on her trunk before extracting her first aid kit and running back in the house.

Inside again, the hall was dark, too dark. Hermione stopped in the doorway staring into the black abyss. A familiar tingle ran up her spine. She closed her eyes and counted to ten. She opened her eyes. The darkness was still there.

_I must have forgotten to turn the light back on. _

On trembling feet, Hermione ran towards the light switch. Desperate hands snatched at it. She flipped it several times before coming to the chilling realization that the storm had knocked out the power. Her heart hammered in her chest and her throat closed up. She clutched the first aid kit to her chest as an all too familiar spark spread over her entire body.

"Not now… please, not now…" she pleaded, her eyes shut tight and her hands white knuckled on the first aid kit. Her breathing was ragged and seemed to fill the entire space.

Then when she feared she would lose control completely, a small voice at the back of her mind called her back from the brink.

_It's all right. There's nothing there to hurt you. _

Hermione opened her eyes the darkness was still surrounding her but not as oppressive, she eased her grip on the first aid kit and exhaled, pressing her free hand over her drumming heart.

_Get a grip, Hermione._

She spent a couple minutes recollecting herself before remembering the flashlight in her first aid kit. She snapped open the kit fumbling around inside before her hands closed around the cirlintrical object. She slid up the on and light flooded her face and the surrounding area. She breathed easier for it.

_This will be good enough until I can find some candles._

* * *

><p>He woke to the savory scent of food, though his stomach lurched at the prospect of eating. Severus blinked staring at flickering light on the ceiling. Where was he? He tried sitting up, the room swayed and his head was threatening to split in two.<p>

"You're awake?" A nervous voice said somewhere nearby.

Severus glanced around a woman was kneeling near him silouhetted by a fire, the firelight casting her hair into a red gold halo.

_Am I dead… It can't be…_"Lily?"

She stood up and shook her head. "I'm sorry, I'm not Lily; my name is Hermione. You were injured I brought you in and treated your wound." She bit her lip nervously.

Alone? He couldn't help but be skeptical. Severus attempted to climb to his feet and realized something, he was naked.

Hermione seemed to realize too and turned away from him.

"Your clothes are all wet; I had to get you out of them." Her voice wobbled a bit.

He scowled at her back and wrapped the blanket that had been over him around his torso.

"And I don't suppose they're dry yet?" He asked.

She shook her head. "I laid out some clothes for you though." She pointed towards a pile on the ground beside him.

Severus glanced towards them.

"I'll leave you to change." She hurried out of the room leaving him in silence.

Severus sat cross legged on the ground with his fingers pressed to his throbbing temples. What was going on? He couldn't remember anything much beyond his name… and Lily. Of course he wouldn't forget her that was just how cruel the universe was.

He rose on shaking limbs, he felt weaker than a day old kitten. He scooped up the pants pulling them over his damp drawers, as he was doing so his hand brushed against the bandages on his thigh. he paused thumbing along the gauze. How had that happened? He slipped on a shirt before falling into a nearby chair his stomach turning.

"How are you feeling, are you hungry?" Hermione was at his shoulder.

He glanced up at her. Her brows were pulled in a straight line and she was wringing her hands.

"I'm fine."

He looked past her and towards a least twenty candles arranged around the room.

"Are you sure I can't get anything for you? You lost quite a bit of blood, perhaps you should lie down."

"I said I'm fine," He snarled. He hadn't intended it to come out that way.

She drew quiet and Severus chanced a glance towards her. She wore an odd expression, something between worry and curiosity.

"Perhaps some water," he said mostly to get him out of his hair.

She bobbed her head and disappeared. Meanwhile, Severus was trying to put his thoughts in order. How had he ended up here? Did this woman know him? She didn't seem to; she hadn't called him by name. Why were his clothes wet? Why had she found him injured? The questions only made his headache worse.

She returned with a glass which she handed to him as she continued to hover above him.

"I don't need a nursemaid," he said snidely.

She didn't even bat an eye. Maybe she did know him.

"You need to drink and, as soon as you're up to it, eat, as well. Like I said, you lost a lot of blood and you've been unconscious for several hours. I would have taken you to the hospital but there's blizzard outside. I did the best I could here, as soon the snow dies down we'll head toward the village."

She was a bit of a nag and right now her chatter was the last thing he wanted to hear, even if she had been tending him.

"Enough." His voice rang through the room and then echoed into silence.

He drank down the remainder of his glass and set it down heavily. She took a seat nearby purposefully looking away from him though he could sense her watching him from the corner of her eye.

"Where am I?" he asked. She opened her mouth to speak and he interrupted. "And keep your answer brief."

"A cabin."

"I need more information than that."

"You asked for me to keep it brief," she returned evenly.

Serverus sighed. "I don't know how I got here or what I'm doing here, I would like to know where I am perhaps I can surmise what has happened here."

Hermione met his gaze and realization dawned behind her eyes. "You're in a cabin in the Scottish Highlands. I found you outside in the middle of the storm bleeding from an injury to your leg, there was no one else around and no sign of where you came from. That's all I know."

Serverus leaned back in his seat. Nothing was ringing a bell. What was he doing in the Scottish Highlands in the dead of winter?

Silence dominated the room for quite some time as he puzzled through his current situation.

"Who's Lily?" Hermione ventured.

Serverus gave her a sharp look. "I don't know."

_Liar. _He thought, he could never forget her. Back there in the snow, because now that she mentioned it he did remember collapsing in the snow, he thought he had died and like a fool he thought she had come for him.

Severus scowled at his folded hands on his lap. None of it added up. Only one thing was clear to him, he should have died. He just wasn't sure why.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three:**

A knock at door brought Albus from the documents he was poring over. It was an expected interruption. Setting everything aside, he called out:

"Come in."

The door cracked open and a round faced young man poked his head through. "You wanted to see me, sir?"

"Ah. Neville my boy, come in." He motioned towards one of the mismatched kitchen chairs across from him.

Neville slipped in closing the door behind him before taking a seat. Instead of meeting the probing gaze of Albus, he stared at the table top where a menagerie of items alternated between puffing small clouds of smoke and spinning.

After a lengthy silence, Neville spoke, "I'm sorry about tonight. When we heard about it, we figured having it would give us an advantage over Voldemort…"

Albus fixed him with his piercing gaze that, when he was younger, had always made him squirm. "But now you regret that decision?" There was no accusation in his tone, only questioning.

"No…. I feel…"

Albus raised a single brow in response.

"Why didn't you tell us… Harry, he could just have easily…"

"Been the chosen one?" Albus finished his sentence.

Neville met his mentor's gaze and nodded.

Albus smiled deepening the wrinkles around his eyes and making his blue eyes twinkle. "And you feel like I could have made a mistake in raising you to be the chosen one?"

Neville jumped to his feet. "Never! I… just that is… Harry and I we were wondering…"

"How I knew who to choose?" Neville nodded and Albus motioned for him to retake his seat. Once Neville was reseated, Albus folded his hands on the table top looking over his half-moon spectacles at them. "The truth is I've never known for sure." Neville gasped but Albus held up his hand to halt an interruption. "I've never known for sure but we do know the night Voldemort attempted to murder you, and killed your parents instead, he marked you as his equal, and as the chosen one, the one destined to destroy him."

"But Harry lost his parents to the war too!"

"Indeed he did, but not at Voldemort's own hand and not because he was after him."

"Is that really all that makes the difference?" Neville's fingernails bit into the flesh of his palm. "Even if I am the chosen one, what have I done to save these people? While I grew up outside the country, Voldemort rose to power and took control of all of Britain, while I was safe… my parents died... hundreds of people died! How is that fair!" Neville was shaking with rage now.

"Spoken like a true chosen one," Albus said quietly.

The room was silent but the faint clink and sighs of Albus' strange contraptions.

"I don't know if I'm strong enough to defeat Voldemort. I know my entire life what I must do. I've been molded for this moment and this time but now that I'm here, I don't know if I can do it," Neville whispered.

Albus rested his head in his upturned hands and regarded his young charge. "From the moment your parents put you in my care, I feared this moment." Neville glanced up sputtering a rebuff but Albus dried up his excuses with one long finger. "However, I've also known you would make the right choice, in the end."

They held one another's gaze while Neville's thoughts took a very pensive turn.

"Thank you, sir; I think I need some time to think." Neville rose to leave.

"Neville." Albus voiced halted him and he turned to face his mentor and foster father. "Next time you and the others want to go out for a reckless adventure, make sure to invite me, you know I hate being left out of a good time."

"Right you are, sir," Neville smiled.

OOO

The girl didn't stop. It was clear by the dark smudges beneath her eyes that she was exhausted and yet she continued to push herself pass her limits. Silly, foolish girl; why do this for him? From the moment he'd opened his mouth he'd been nothing but a complete prat to her, and she took it all. Severus watched with hooded eyes as she laid a bowl of soup on a platter beside him before she stumbled with her portion back to the chair by the fire. He glared at the bowl as if it was a foreign object. From the way his stomach rolled at the scent, he thought it best to leave it untouched. This girl, why had she saved him, a stranger, didn't she have any common sense? A woman, alone in the wilderness taking a strange, seemingly harmless man into her home, wasn't that similar to the start of some sinister horror?

Without realizing it, he'd been staring at her and when she caught him at it, she set her spoon down with a clatter.

"Did you need something? You should really eat." Her worried expression seemed to accentuate the dark circles around her eyes.

_How many hours had it been since she had a proper rest? No common sense, reckless and a fool._

He picked up his bowl. "Perhaps you should think about taking care of yourself, you look ready to collapse."

The soup warmed his clammy hands but did not entice him to eat. _Fool or not, she did save your life. _A snide voice said at the back of mind. _But did he deserve saving? He couldn't shake this feeling that something had gone wrong._

"I'm fine, I don't need to sleep," she said in a small voice.

He snorted in disbelief but she was either ignoring him or did not hear him. Severus chanced another glanced in her direction; she was watching the fire flicker as if in a trance. What a very odd girl. She turned to look at him as if summoned by magic, their eyes met for the first time and he felt as if he could read her thoughts plainly; worry, panic, fear and something else lingering behind it all, looming figures in dark cloaks and hands outstretched then a flash of light before everything went black. Her gasp brought him back to the present.

He broke their contact and looked past her, but from the corner of his eye he could see her rubbing her temples. Something about that scene seemed familiar, why? As if it happened in a dream. Once again he was cruelly reminded of his own missing memories. What was wrong with him?

"Do you not like the soup?" The girl asked her voice wobbling. Before he could protest she had set aside her hardly touched broth and was pacing about the room rambling. "There's still no electricity but I could make something different." She started to bustle out of the room, most likely to make him something else he wouldn't eat. Without thinking his hand darted out and around her wrist.

She halted and stared at their connection. He withdrew as if her skin burned him.

"This is fine." He raised the spoon to his lips and choked it down or meant to. It was actually rather good, a bit thin, but good. His appetite kicked in and he ate steadily while she hovered above him. "I'm eating, you can sit down now."

She hovered for a moment longer, he half-entertained the idea of trying to making eye contact to see if he could read her thoughts but thought better of it in the end. She eased herself back into the chair, leaving her food untouched. He ate in silence which he recalled he preferred. Things were coming back to him little by little but not much; there were childhood memories, mostly about Lily and the hovel back on Spinners End. Other snippets of things came back as well, his favorite foods, his personal preferences for clothing and company. With all these memories, it also occurred to him he should probably thank the idiot for saving him. He set down his bowl and was prepared to clear his throat, when a sigh rose through the air.

_Fool. _He rose on wobbly feet and pulled a blanket off the couch before limping over to the chair beside the fire. Her head was pillowed on her arms, the worries she carried waking relaxed. He watched her for a moment as the fire light danced over her features. _Can't imagine why I thought you were her. You look nothing alike. _He draped the blanket over her shoulders.

"Idiot girl," he muttered.

OOO

Dawn bloomed on the horizon a blur of crimson, gold and umber while Neville rested his elbows on the balcony watching the colors bleed through the sky. _Another morning, another battle over and still no end in sight_. Lost in his thoughts, Neville didn't hear the gentle shuffle of feet behind him until they were well upon him. A hand came down on his shoulder and he drew his wand out of instinct, he twirled jabbing it at the chest of the intruder.

Harry held up his hands in surrender. "Sorry didn't mean to scare you."

Neville lowered his wand with a good natured smile. "Sorry, mate, I'm a bit on edge this morning."

Harry leaned on the railing beside him. "Can't sleep either?" He asked watching the other from the corner of his eye.

"Not really."

"Me either." Harry smiled wryly.

They watched the sunrise without saying much of anything; they shared an unspoken understanding between them that went deeper than words.

"Harry, do you ever wonder…" he shook his head. "Never mind."

"You don't have to hold back from me."

"I've just been thinking, what if Voldemort hadn't come after me… and my family… what if…"

"He had come after me?" Harry offered.

Neville nodding, fearing to meet the piercing green eyes of his closest mate, funny the chosen one would be scared of another man his age.

Harry was quiet for a long time. "I've been wondering the same thing, ever since we heard it last night. The prophecy never named either one of us. Just the date of our birth… but Voldemort chose you, and isn't that enough to make you the chosen one?" Harry said logically.

Neville forced a smile. "Of course." Neville clapped Harry on the shoulder and turned to leave. "I'm starved; I think I'm going to see if Mrs. Weasley has anything for breakfast."

Harry grabbed him by the upper arm. "It's okay to be afraid. There's no shame in it."

Neville shrugged him off gently. "I know." He stalked away a few steps before he turned around. "What about you, Harry, are you going to tell me what's eating you?"

A dark shadow passed over Harry's expression and then he too forced a smile. "Don't worry about me, I just couldn't sleep."

They met one another gaze and shared an unspoken truce. "Yeah; see you later." Neville waved over his shoulder.

Once Harry was alone, he removed a crinkled photo from within his breast pocket and stretched it out. Two young people smiled up at him, a girl, with auburn locks and eyes just like his, smiled and waved while using her free arm to force a sallow faced boy with greasy black hair into the frame, his fisted tightened on it but he held back from destroying it.

"Why him, of all people… why ask him?"


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter Four:**

No matter how far she ran, she couldn't get away. Her legs were on fire and her lungs stung as they struggled for oxygen. She shouldn't have, but she looked over her shoulder, the pursuers were only getting closer. She stumbled and fell, and then they were upon her, casting their long shadows over her. One stepped forward, his arm outstretched, his dark eyes focused on her and willing her to hold his gaze. He pointed at her and Hermione threw her arms up to shield her face from a blow and through the crack between her arms, she could see as a blast of light before it obliterated her into darkness.

Hermione woke with a jolt and a blanket slid off her shoulders. She glanced around the room, it was devoid of habitation. That's right: her parents had gotten snowed in back in the village. Her hand clutched idly at the blanket.

_Did I fall asleep by the fire? But who put the blanket on me?_

A crash echoed down the hall from the kitchen and Hermione jumped up.

"Mom, Dad, when did you get back?" She shouted as she ran into the kitchen but instead of her parents, she was greeted by a sour expression of the man who she had rescued the night before stooped over some pots and pans that had fallen from their hooks.

"I'm afraid I am neither your mother nor father," he said snidely as he replaced a cast iron pan.

_It hadn't all been a dream, well, at least he hadn't…_

"Don't just stand their staring, you idiot, the pipes have frozen overnight so will have to melt down snow if we don't want to die of dehydration before we freeze to death." He shoved a cooking pot into her arms.

He turned away from her to open cabinets and methodically scanned the contents while muttering things like 'not much' and 'can't cook that' or 'if it keeps going at this rate, we'll need to ration'.

Hermione stared at his back, scowling. _Who does he think he is? Taking charge! He should be resting!_

Sensing her eyes upon him, he whirled around. "Well get going." He shooed her with a hand motion and for some idiotic reason she obeyed.

As she shrugged on her winter boots and coat, Hermione silently berated herself. _Why am I listening to him, this is my cabin -well, my family rented this cabin- besides with his injuries he shouldn't be exerting himself. _She lifted her gaze towards the kitchen; he didn't make a sound except for the occasional slight scoffing sound. _Who is he? I don't even know his name and he's ordering me around. _She considering going back and getting to the bottom of this mystery when logic superseded ego. If the pipes were indeed frozen over, they would need fresh water to cook and drink and if the pipes had frozen over there was a good chance the gas was out too. _I hope the plow comes soon, _Hermione thought as she flung open the door to the cabin, forgetting another complication caused by the storm. The door was ripped from her grip as a mountain of snow, waist deep, avalanched into the entry way. She let out a yelp of surprise just barely sidestepping the tumble of snow.

The man came out from the kitchen and looked down his nose at her. "You do know that a blizzard means snow pile up, don't you?"

"I am perfectly aware of that, thank you," she said in a passable mock of his snide tone.

"Obviously," he drawled.

Hermione balled her fists at her sides_. Of all the ungrateful, arrogant, prats!_ She twirled away and stomped up the snow pile and out the door into a winter wonderland. The surrounding area was blanketed in white; the only discernable landmarks were the tops of some pine trees struggling through massive snow banks and a pile where her car had been. She couldn't see where the road had been as she shaded her eyes and strained to see in the distance but everything was white and gray with the occasional pockets of green. Snow continued falling listlessly.

"Looks as if we'll be here quite a while," the man said.

Hermione rounded on him. "What makes you say that? I'm sure the plow will be around in a couple hours to dig us out."

"I highly doubt it. Judging by our isolation, the nearest town has to be at least thirty minutes away and a one plow town, I'm sure, and with this much snow, they'll be working for most of the day clearing the main city streets before they start on the outlying dwellings, my best guest would be three days at the most."

"Three days but its Christmas today!" Hermione squeaked.

The man looked at her with an unreadable expression. "Make it four days and that's if there isn't any more snow…" he tilted his head back to the sky his curtain of black hair parting and revealing his prominent nose. He looked back at her. "And from the state of the clouds, I wouldn't count on it."

Hermione's stomach clenched with nerves.

"But I can't be sitting here for four days or more just waiting around! I have a paper and winter homework; plus, what about my parents, they're down in the village!"

He stalked around without answering heading back towards the back of the cabin.

"Don't ignore me!" she snapped.

He pivoted to face her; his expression steely. "What would you have me say? Would you like some false comfort because I have none to give. You may think your concerns supersede my own but unfortunately, I lost my ability for empathy when I lost all my memories. Now if you don't mind I'm going to find a shovel to clear out the snow from the entryway."

He strode away his arms held tight at his side. Hermione watched him go feeling half an inch tall.

_He can't remember anything? _ It seemed inconsistent with his injuries. Hermione furrowed her brow as the man disappeared around the corner of the house. _Perhaps I have been a bit self absorbed but who wouldn't be in this situation? _Hermione cast another glance across the landscape, _Maybe I should call Mom and Dad see if there's any news on how long we'll be out here._

Crouching down, Hermione filled the pot with snow and then head back into the cabin.

OOO

Dr. Granger paced the floor of her room, periodically checking the mantle clock nearby. It was nearly half past noon. She ran towards the wall charger, in vain hope her phone had been charging despite the lack of electricity. The screen remained obstinately blank and she bit her lip – a nervous habit her only daughter had picked up from her.

The door to her room opened and she ran to greet her husband. "What news, can we send someone out there to get her?"

Dr. Granger shook his head. "I'm afraid not, the rescue crews are all tied up taking care of serious cases." He sank down onto their bed.

"How is this not a serious case?" she exclaimed. "Our daughter is alone in the wilderness in the middle of this storm. You heard what the radio said, this storm will be on and off for days!"

Her husband shook his head heavily. "I know. I'm worried about her too. This is not how I wanted to spend Christmas."

"What if she runs out of food or water or firewood," his wife fretted.

Dr. Granger got up and rested his hands on her shoulders. "She's going to be alright, she's in a secure place with the knowledge and supplies to be safe for a month on her own."

"But… what if she has another episode?" his wife pressed.

Dr. Granger squeezed his wife's shoulders. "The specialist said as long as she's not under too much pressure, she should be fine. Besides, she hasn't had an episode in years."

His wife sniffled. "I know but you know how she gets when she's in the dark. It could trigger it…"

Dr. Granger led his wife to sit down and wrapped his arm around her shoulder. "I promise, as soon as we can, we'll get to her until then just believe in Hermione."

She nodded her head and after blowing her nose on a handkerchief, her husband had handed her, she said, "I just wish I had left more candles up in the cabin."


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter Five:**

"We're sorry but the caller you are trying to reach cannot be reached at this time. Please hang up and try your call again."

Hermione growled with frustration and flung her phone down onto the bed. _Why can't I get through; I could receive calls before. _Hermione threw herself back on the coverlet to stare at the ceiling. _Maybe the nearest cell phone tower was knocked out during the storm. _She rolled over onto her side. _But what am I going to do now, trapped here with that… ingrate. _Hermione huffed as she sat up and swung her legs over the edge of the bed.

_I was being selfish though. _She reflected. _But he was also a great big git. _She shook her head. _You don't know anything about him there's probably a perfectly reasonable explanation for why he's so… prickly. Maybe I should go apologize… _the more she thought about it, the more it sounded like the most reasonable thing to do.

She slid off the bed and padded down the hallway. The cabin was filled with natural light but it almost seemed like there was a dark aura hanging about the living room. A merry fire was crackling in the fireplace and in her cozy chair was the man. His intense gaze was directed towards the dancing flames and even when it wasn't directed towards her it was daunting. Hermione stopped in the doorway, fearful to interrupt his pensive mood. He looked up, sensing her lingering.

"I'm sorry… about earlier," she said.

He looked away and back towards the fire. She almost heard something that sounded like a 'forget it.'

Hermione, timidly, slunk into the room and sat on the couch across from him.

"I was thinking we could start over, since we're going to be here for a while it seems." He glared up at her with his deep black eyes; it occurred to her that this must be his personal defense mechanism, to keep people away.

He said nothing and kept his expression neutral.

"Right… well, I'll start… My name is Hermione Granger; I'm a medical student at Oxford University."

He stared at her. "What am I supposed to say in response?"

"Well… your name, I guess."

"Severus Snape."

_What an odd name. _

"Do you find my name, amusing?" He sneered as if reading her mind.

"Not at all, it's nice to meet you, Severus." She extended her hand to shake and he took it grudgingly almost as if he wasn't sure what to do with her.

But if he really did have memory loss that could suggest a concussion, though he didn't show any pressing signs, slurred speech and the like, it was still something to be concerned with. And how on earth did he end up in the middle of nowhere?

Silence stretched out between them. It seemed to be a reoccurring theme with them. Hermione cast around the room for a topic. It wasn't as if she could ask him about himself since he couldn't remember anything. Eventually, her eyes came to rest upon the Christmas tree unadorned and out of the way in a far corner of the room.

"I know what will do us both a world of good." She jumped up and ran over to the tree. "A bit of Christmas cheer will break up this gloom."

He turned away from her and grabbed a book off the table.

Hermione bristled at the obvious brush off. "You could at least say no thank you."

"I did not know you were my mother."

Hermione stomped over him and got up into his face. "At least I'm trying! This isn't exactly my ideal Christmas, I know you've got your issues but I have a right to be upset about my own problems!"

He blinked at her and set aside his book.

"Do you suppose decorating that tree will melt the snow and bring your parents here to you?"

Hermione's vision was blurred by tears. "Of course not but it's better than sitting here and pouting."

"I think you could hardly say I am 'pouting'."

"What do you call it then? You've been ignoring me and condescending every since you woke up. I'm starting to regret ever saving you."

"Who said I wanted to be saved?"

The words hung on the air between them and Hermione slowly lowered her fisted hand. Once it was said, however, it couldn't be unsaid.

Severus rose from his chair. "I'm going out."

She didn't stop him and let him bustle out of the room.

_What did I get myself into?_

OOO

Snow crunched beneath his boots as he stalked away from the cabin. Perhaps it would be best to leave that girl and that cabin behind. The same thoughts kept running through his head. Who was he? Why could he only spew venom at her when she obviously trying to help him. Why did he feel only self loathing for himself? What had he done? His memories were returning slowly mostly his distant past, much of which Lily dominated. He remembered a boarding school, an education but nothing that told him _who _he was. It was maddening.

If he were a less controlled man, he would have punched something or perhaps even kicked up a fuss but even without fully knowing who he was, an invisible restraint of self control held him in check. He stopped to leaning up against the top of a pine tree emerging from a snow bank. The scent of the forest filled his nostrils as he bunched the pine needles in his hands. They pricked his fingers but did not nearly enough damage to satisfy him.

He was scum. That's what he could recall: the worst type of person who did not even deserve her kindness. Severus slumped down to kneel in the snow letting the cold and wet seep into his bones. He should never return.

OOO

Hours passed. For the tenth time, Hermione looked up from her text book. Surely he would come back, where else would he go? It wasn't as if he could walk to the village. Outside the window, snow was falling again. _Maybe I should go after him._ Hermione got up with the intent of doing just that when something gleaming caught her eye. She reached out her fingers brushing against the smooth stick Severus had been holding when she found him, an image flashed through her mind. A hand outstretched and something very similar held in it. Her hand recoiled. Obviously a coincidence it had nothing to do with her reoccurring dream… she backed away slowly.

_I'm going to go look for him. _

Hermione hurried out the living room and into the entry way, it had been swept clean. She felt a pang of guilt, if she had been more careful he wouldn't have had to sweep all that up. It was just another thing to apologize for once she found him. She shrugged on her coat and put on her boots for what felt like the millionth time. She opened the door and a small amount of snow rolled in, Severus had shoveled a walk way outside their door.

It was getting darker already; the days were short this time of year. Hermione suppressed an involuntary shiver. If she was quick about it, she would bring Severus back and then they could have a cup of tea and talk this out. She set out into the storm.

OOO

He was initially surprised to find the door ajar and snow piled in the entry way. _That idiot girl._ He grumbled to himself as he trod into the cabin. He'd been gone longer than he planned but he needed the time to cool off. He still had no answers but he felt better none the less. He shed his coat and boots and headed towards the living room. The fire was blazing but Hermione was nowhere in sight. He had no intention of apologizing but he wanted to at least inform her he had returned. He headed for the kitchen, it was also empty. More perplexed than worried, he checked the bedrooms and both were empty. That's was when the inevitable truth hit him like a sack of bricks.

_Fool-hardy idiot. _Severus stormed towards the front door but before he could reach his coat and boots a scream rent the still night air.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter Six:**

"_Bushy Rabbit!"_

_**I'm not. **_

"_Bushiiiee raaaabbiit"_

_**Stop it! I'm not.**_

"_Hermione the-big-toothed-bushy-haired-wabbit!"_

"_I said to stop it!" _

_There was a popping sound like the firing of a gun and the Billy didn't get back up again._

"_What did you do to him!"_

"_Rabbit-teeth killed Billy!"_

_No, I didn't mean to hurt anyone, he was making fun of me and I couldn't help it!_

_There was another explosion and suddenly I was surrounded by men in black. It had to be the police, but who had called them? I didn't have time to explain; I could only run. I ran and they followed me, those strange men who had come out of nowhere. Before I got far, I collapsed; something had glued my legs together. _

_I tried to crawl away but they kept coming. They stalked over to me, those men, and he separated from the group and loomed over me, the man that changed my life forever. _

"_I'm sorry, I didn't mean to, it was an accident," I pleaded tears were running down my face._

_He raised his hand and with a cruel smile he swiped through the air… _

* * *

><p>Severus' head swung towards to door. That idiot had gone out looking for him and gotten herself in trouble.<p>

"Don't you know I'm not some sort of hero," he said sardonically.

Severus shoved his arms back into his coat and slammed his foot into his boots. Outside the door, the night was closing in. The sky was streaked with crimson of the dying day. _I won't find her in this light. I need one of those light contraptions that muggles use. _He stopped mid stride, where had that word come from? He stomped into the living room, no time for that now, the idiot could be dead by the time he found her, if he continued wasting time. He swore he had noticed one in the living room. The fire and the multitude of candles left the room in long shadows.

Another scream echoed across the valley.

"Blast." He dropped to his knees feeling around in the dark when his hand closed around something long and wooden he removed it. _What is this? _A tingling sensation travelled up his arm and down his spine to the tips of his toes. If felt right, why, he couldn't say. For now, he shoved it in his coat pocket. Reaching beneath the chair he'd last seen her in, he retracted with the cylindrical object. Pushing up the switch light flooded his features.

He jumped to his feet, as fast as his damaged leg would allow and head out into the night.

* * *

><p><em>Before the light erupted from the end of his fingers, I could see his features. Even to my child's eyes he looked so sad, his expression was cruel mockery but his dark eyes were full of despair as if he didn't want to what he was about to do to me. I tried to plead with him to not do it or even ask would it hurt? <em>

_His mouth opened destroying the sneer. "__**Obliviate."**_

_I was left in a world of complete darkness afterwards, no light, and no sound just the crush and the fear. Where was I, who am I? But his face… I cannot forget his face. __Whenever I'm in darkness, the memories come back, the ones I cannot remember any other time, the dark reminds me of the empty feeling or the fear and of his sad-cruel eyes._

* * *

><p>The wind echoed across the valley. The girl had gone quiet which only made the situation all the more difficult. Severus' breath was coming out in staggered clouds shrouding him as he trudge the snow, he'd found her tracks, they echoed his own path until the storm had begun to obscure them. He scanned the landscape before him, nothing but tree tops and white.<p>

He turned around to try the other direction when his light skimmed over a mass of auburn and red in the snow. He stumbled towards her. Her auburn hair was splayed on the snow and her lips were turning blue.

"Foolish girl."

By holding the flashlight with his chin, he could bring her into his arms; she weighed less than he thought she would. They trudged through the snow, the fresh flakes falling onto her face and catching in her hair. His injury was bleeding; he could feel the sticky warm blood rolling down his leg.

When they were nearly to the cabin, her eyes fluttered open. Her pupils were dilated to the size of saucers and she screamed, it echoed across the valley like a sinister howl.

"No. I won't let you take my memories again, I won't!"

She convulsed in his grip and he stumbled kneeling in the snow. Rolled out of his grasp, she tried to crawl away. He grabbed her by the ankle and she turned to face him like a caged animal before she struck at him with nails and flailing arms. He caught one hand before it landed a second blow and with his free hand, he struck her, hard, across the face.

"Get a hold of yourself."

She merely stared at him gap mouthed for a moment before dropping her hands to her sides that's when the tears began to flow. He wasn't sure what was worse, the biting and clawing or the crying. Severus sighed and rose to his feet. Kneeling in the snow, she cried her voice snatched away by the howl of the wind. He wasn't good with people, that was obvious. But for the first time he wished he was.

"Take the time you need to pull yourself together and then we're going back inside."

She sobbed for a few more minutes and eventually ebbing into sniffles. After she dried her eyes on her sleeve, he held out his hand and helped her to her feet. They said not a word as they shuffled back into the house.

* * *

><p>Hermione slipped off her sopping clothes, dropping them to the ground too tired to even care about cleaning up. A pair of warm woolen pajamas waited for her in the top drawer, she pulled those out and slid into them. She was feeling more alive if not a bit shaken. Once again, her episode had left her drained and confused. She never remembered anything once they were over, just the profound sense of loss, as if everyone she knew and loved died.<p>

Hermione flopped down on the bed, hugging a pillow to her chest. She couldn't suppress a few tears that trailed down her cheek as she rolled over burrowing her face into the comforter. _What's wrong with me? Years of therapy and I'm still afraid of the dark._

There was a sharp knock at the door and Hermione glanced up startled.

"Open the door," Severus said from the other side in a surly tone.

Hermione jumped to her feet and ran to open it. Swinging open the door, her heart leapt into her throat. Severus raised a brow in question as she placed her hand over her suddenly racing heart.

"Something the matter?" he asked dryly.

Hermione shook her head. _Must be some lingering effects of my attack, there's no way… _

"You should rest and drink this." Severus thrust a steaming glass into her shaking hands. She looked up to meet his gaze and got lost in his dark-sad eyes.

"Thank you," she said quietly dropping her gaze down to the cup in her hands and then sniffed it. "What's in it?"

"A combination of herbs that promote calm."

Hermione gave it another cautionary smell, it wasn't that she didn't trust him, because for some strange reason she did, she was surprised he would do something so thoughtful for her.

"Smells like lavender." She smiled and added hopefully, "Are you good with herbs?"

"It would appear so." He said coolly and then turning on his heel, he stalked away from her. She watched him go a few paces noticing how he avoided putting full weight on his bad leg, then it hit her.

"Wait!" she called after him.

He stopped and scowled over his shoulder. "Yes?"

"Let me have a look at your leg."

He shifted as to shield it from her vision. "Don't you think you should take care of yourself at the moment?"

"I think that if your wound reopened and got infected that you would die a painful death out here in the middle of nowhere." She sounded strong but every inch of her body was screaming for rest.

The result was a staring contest and neither of them was willing to back down. In the end, Severus gave in to her medical knowledge and followed her back into the bedroom. Hermione directed him to sit and roll up his pant leg. The wrappings were soaked in blood.

"I had planned to treat this myself," Severus said but Hermione wasn't paying attention her mind was playing through a million scenarios each worst than the last.

With a good mental shake, she focused on the task at hand and when her hand reached out to pull the bindings from his thigh, Severus flinched. Her eyes flickered up to him but he was looking purposefully away from her.

_He doesn't like to be touched. _

Hermione unrolled the bindings to find an angry red gash, blood trickled down his thigh; there was no obvious sign of infection which was good. All the exertion must have reopened the wound. She snapped open her first aid kit and felt eyes on the back of her head. She turned and found him watching her. They regarded at one another in silence.

The questions 'who are you and what do you have to do with my episodes?' were at the tip of her tongue but she held them back.

"I think you'll live," she said. "You just reopened the wound running around in the snow."

"Me 'running around in the snow' wouldn't have been necessary if you hadn't come after me."

She avoided answering the obvious prod by dabbing his wound with antiseptic. He hissed through his teeth which gave her an odd sense of satisfaction.

"I wouldn't have run out after you, if you hadn't run away in the first place."

"I never asked for your help."

"You never told me you didn't want my help either."

She expected a snarky retort, a scoff anything than what she heard. "I apologize for the trouble I've caused you."

If was said so quietly, Hermione wasn't sure she had heard him correctly, she whipped her head up with a 'what' taking shape in her throat when he stood abruptly and stormed out of the room.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: I realize Severus is acting a little OOC but I have my reasoning. I assure you this storming off and apologizing will end when he remembers who is. Thank you to everyone who's reviewed, favorited and alerted, you're all amazing. **


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter Seven:**

Severus slammed the bedroom door behind him. They hadn't discussed him using the bedroom across the hall but he wasn't going to be sleeping on the bloody couch! He could only handle so much invasion of privacy and he had reached his limit. Stalking over to the bed, he sank down onto it and cradling his head in his hands, he heaved a sigh. What was wrong with him? Even if he couldn't remember much, he knew he wasn't the type to apologize to a dunderhead who rushes in without a thought.

_She's just like a damned Gryfindor. _

His eyes shot open and he glared a painting in front of him. Where were these words coming from? Did they have a connection to the pieces of him that he could not recall? Scowling at the portrait of a reproduction mountain landscape with a vast lake nestled between mountain peaks it started to transform beneath his gaze. And the longer he stared, the more familiar it became. The mountain peaks morphed into a gothic castle perched atop rolling hills and in the distance he could see a forest shrouded in ominous mist. The lake from the portrait transformed to one that was a green crystalline and something that looked suspiciously like a tentacle was emerging from its depths. He closed his eyes again and when he opened them he was staring at the reproduction landscape.

Where these his memories or some sort of delusion created by an exhausted and stressed mind?

Severus raked his hands through his limp black hair.

Suddenly, his arm started to burn with a searing pain that blinded his vision and blocked everything out for a moment. He fell back on the bed panting and gasping; rolling back the sleeve of his arm, he revealed a dark tattoo on his forearm, a skull with a snake emerging from the eye socket.

He glared at the tattoo which radiated the pain.

"Who am I?"

* * *

><p>"Harry dear, you haven't touched anything on your plate are you feeling all right?"<p>

Mrs. Weasley's ruddy face absorbed Harry's vision and he forced a smile to reassure her, the last thing he needed was to be hen-pecked by the well meaning woman. He shoveled an over-large spoonful of potatoes into his mouth but they tasted like ash. She stood over him as he chewed and swallowed before giving her the thumbs up.

"I'm fine, just thinking," he replied after swallowing the lump of potatoes painfully.

She tutted over him for another brief second but was distracted by Fred and George who were giving a graphic (and loud) recounting of the infiltration of the ministry to some of the smaller kids. She gave Harry another dalop of mashed potatoes before bustling after the twins who had jumped to their feet with wand's drawn.

Across the table from Harry, Ron was furrowing his brow through a mouthful of shepard's pie. "Yu alrigh, map?"

Harry smiled at his best mate, aside from Neville. "Fine, just have a bit of a headache."

Ron swallowed hard choking on his food. As he was turning purple and sputtering, Ginny cast a spell freeing his wind pipes. He clutched at his throat sucking in desperate breathes for a few minute before he could make a cohesive remark.

"If you're not feeling well, go have Poppy check you out." He pointed with his fork, a bit of sausage dangling from it.

"No, I don't want to trouble her, its Christmas."

They all looked down the table where Poppy and Minerva were toasting with a glass of sherry, their cheeks rosy.

"It's nice to let our hair down for once," Ginny said conversationally as she brushed aside the wisps of her ginger hair. The frazzled ends kept falling into her eyes and she'd begun a self conscious habit of pushing them away. Harry watched as her hand drifted through the air where her formerly long locks used to fall to her shoulders. Catching him staring she smiled and ruffled her pixie style cut. As if to say: I don't mind the change.

Harry dropped his eyes to the table; he wasn't up to pretending everything was. If he hadn't let his guard down Ginny wouldn't have lost her hair… when he thought about it for too long he only realized how many injured there had been for such a foolhardy scheme.

_Is this really what fighting a war is like? _He wondered.

As if on cue, Neville arrived with an arm load of butterbeers effectively lightening the somber mood that had settled over the trio. Plopping the bottles onto the table, they sloshed over their rims in foamy rivules.

"Merry Christmas, everyone," Neville cheered.

There was a resounded response from around the room and a few who had been listening to Fred and George's recountance of the ministry incident came over to pat Neville on the back. And Ron was absorbed by the Christmas pudding Mrs. Weasley had just served and while Ginny was arguing with her mother about her hair, Harry took the opportunity to slip away.

No one noticed him as he slid out the kitchen door and out into the garden beyond. In a few hurried paces, he was out of the garden gate and making his way down the forest path and at to the pond's edge. He plopped down on the pebbly shore and stared at the moon reflected in the water's surface.

He grabbed a handful of pebbles and skid them along the mirrored surfaced. A few jumped along before plunking into the water and rippling outwards.

"Feeling anti-social?"

Harry whirled around and Sirius, leaning against a tree trunk, gave him a toothy grin.

"I guess you could say that." Harry tossed the remainder of his pebbles into the water and rose to his feet. "Did Mrs. Weasley send you after me?"

"No, actually, I just got back and I saw you slipping away with that look."

"What look?" Harry returned.

"The one you used to get all the time when you were a kid, when you did something wrong."

"How could I ever do something wrong when you raised me?"

Sirius laughed. "Sometimes you're too much like your father."

Right after his dad died, Harry used to love hearing that, now it didn't seem to have the same effect.

"So are you going to tell me what's eating you?"

Harry sighed as he turned away from his foster father. "Do I have a choice?"

"Of course you have a choice, but I've heard that it's better to talk it out or some nonsense like that."

Harry laughed despite himself and Sirius joined with his bark-like laughter. As their laughter echoed over the water's surface, the mood took another somber turn.

"Sirius, did my mother have any friends in school?"

Sirius furrowed his brow. "Yeah, she was best friends with Mary McDonald, you wouldn't know her though; she was a newt(1) during the war. I think she has an office job at the ministry now."

"No, I mean… a _male_ friend."

Tension crackled on the air between them.

"Yeah," Sirius growled, "And I think I know who you're talking about."

"Then Severus didn't lie to me. Him and my mother used to be best friends?" Harry asked.

Sirius balled his fists at his side and through ground teeth he said, "Yeah. I can't imagine why she ever trusted that slime ball. He's the one who betrayed her to the regime and killed her with his own two hands. Why do you ask? What'd that bastard say to you? I swear I will ring his greasy neck."

Harry's stomach clenched and threatened to expel what little it had in it.

_Why would my mother's killer tell me that? To taunt me? For unknown revenge? I thought I knew the face of evil but Severus Snape is the true face of evil. It had to be a lie!_

"What did he say?" Sirius shouted.

Harry shook his head slowly. "Nothing… he just said that his mother was his friend and that I was making the wrong choice fighting with Dumbledore… he offered me the chance to leave the order."

"That slimy bastard." Sirius punched a nearby tree which shook beneath his rage. "As if James' son, my foster son, would leave the side of light for their side."

Sirius paced about the clearing shouting obscenities that brought a smile to Harry's face. Truth or lies, Severus was gone now. He had cast the stunning spell that had sent him over the edge and watched him fall. Unfortunately, all his secrets had gone with him.

* * *

><p>A grandfather clock in the corner of the room struck midnight while Voldemort shifted through documents on his desk. A knock at his door brought his red eyes to the offending interruption. Lucky for the interloper, he was in a good mood despite the unfortunate news this evenings meeting had brought about.<p>

"Enter," he said magnanimously.

Lucius strode in before bowing low to his master. "Pardon me, my lord, as I returned home I received urgent notice from our source within the order."

Voldemort leaned back in his chair. "Is that so, Lucius. Well unfortunately, you're too late."

Lucius' smug smile faltered "My lord?"

"You're too late, Lucius, my faithful informant has given me all the information I need," he replied while steepling his fingers.

"They cannot know this, my lord, Severus is-"

"Severus is not being held captive by the order but is presumed dead?" Voldemort asked with a chill in his voice.

Lucius trembled but steady his hand upon his cane. One did not show fear to Lord Voldemort, to do so was to surely encure his wrath. "Yes, my lord."

Voldemort laughed high and long. "Sit, Lucius."

He did as he was told, his eyes darting about the room and his hand reflexing over his wand holster.

"I am pleased you did not delay in bringing this news to me, though you were too late." The door at the back of the room swung open and a massive python slithered in. Lucius watched its progress from the corner of his eye. "Your calculating nature is exactly why I chose you for the minister position over your sister-in-law."

"And I hope I continue to serve you in that capacity," Lucius said automatically.

Voldemort idly stroked Nagini's head. "Indeed. However, our plans for a pure wizard future cannot continue without Severus, he is the back-bone to all my plans."

"Is, my lord? But we have intelligence that suggests he is dead…"

"He was fighting the potter boy at the ministry, wasn't he?" Nagini lifted her triangular head and flickered her tongue towards Lucius who shifted uncomfortably in his seat before he nodded. "According to my insider at the order Potter never administers a killing blow and furthermore they were fighting on top of _it._"

Lucius' eyes widened in realization. "You don't mean he's alive? Somewhere but we haven't even tested it yet…"

"Which is exactly why you need to get your men working on _it_. Severus is a crucial piece in my plans. Time is running short, Longbottom is in England and the rebels have begun formulating a plan to destroy all I have worked for.

"But, my lord, what if Severus is dead?"

Voldemort turned his crimson eyes onto his subordinate, their gazes met and he saw the fear and uncertainty in his thoughts, he did not want Severus back, Severus' position within the ministry threatened his own, as did his favor with the dark lord. Voldemort broke their eye contact and smiled in a way that made Lucius' stomach turn.

"Severus is no threat to you Lucius. He has his place and he remembers who the true ruler of this country is." He waved his hand. "Now go, before I change my mind about punishing your sedition."

Lucius rose, bowed and left the dark lord in his office. Voldemort stroked Nagini idly as his crimson eyes trailed over the line of portraits that surrounded his circular office, most were empty, as they had always been since the beginning of his career as Headmaster of Hogwarts and shadow king to the British Wizarding world.

"_Soon, the world will understand the meaning of our power," _he hissed to Nagini._ "Once the rebels are crushed nothing will stand in my way from obliterating all of non-wizarding kind."_

* * *

><p><em>AN: Not much SeverusXHermione this chapter but I had to get some background nonsense out of the way. Leave me your thoughts, it really inspires me to write faster. ;)_

_1. Newt is a term for someone who didn't choose a side during the fight between light and dark in other words stayed nuetral. _


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter Eight:

As if ripped from a Norman Rockwell painting, steam wafted from the ceramic servers. They overflowed with roasted potatoes, Brussels sprouts and a golden-topped pudding. They all surrounded a glistening turkey. Her mouth watered at the sight, and she realized that everything had been a bad dream, the snowstorm, her attack and that strange man Severus.

"Mom, pass the potatoes."

"Here, dear."

Hermione turned to accept the dish but let it fall to the ground with a clatter. She jumped out of her chair and stumbled backwards.

"Mom, what happened, your face…?"

"What is it, Pumpkin?" Her pseudo father interjected. Something had gone wrong… horribly wrong.

"Where have your faces gone? Why can't I see your faces?" Hermione shouted.

The pair of them closed in on her. The Christmas dinner disappeared. Their faces were flat and without features, like dummy heads. Hermione turned to run but her feet felt like led, too weak to carry her weight. The fake parents loomed over her and a sinister howl echoed through her head. She crawled away dragging her useless legs behind her. She shot a panicked look over her shoulder, and numerous cloaked figures had joined the original pair. They surrounded her and one man stepped out from the shadows, Severus.

She met his gaze and found the pleading words stuck on her tongue. He showed no sympathy as he swung his arm before she was awash in the darkness once more.

OOO

Hermione startled awake. Outside the wind howled and a candle sputtered by her bedside. She jumped up and scrounged for a replacement candle. She lit it from the dying embers of the first and settled back onto the bed.

_It was just a nightmare. It was just a nightmare. _

The nightmare and the howl of the wind banished any sleep she could hope to get that night. She cast about for her novel, thinking to read for a while and distract her from her fears. She recalled leaving it in the living room. The prospect of a bright fire tipped the balance for her to relocate to said room.

Once in the living room, she stoked the fire and a warm blaze caught. Long shadows danced on the opposite wall. Judging by the clock on the wall, it was well past midnight and Hermione expected to have hours of quiet reflection before her patient-guest woke. She snuggled into her chair and resumed her place in _Jane Eyre. _

The night stretched on with the occasional pop of the fire and rustle of pages. Lost in the gothic mystery, Hermione did not hear the shuffle of feet from down the hall but did hear the creak of a loose floorboard. Glancing up, her heart stopped for half a second as Severus, standing in the shadows, gave the appearance of a lurking specter.

He did apologize for his silent approach, or explain why he would be up at this time of night.

Catching her breath Hermione managed to speak, "Can't sleep?"

"Obviously," he said.

He turned away from her, presumably to head back to bed. Logic would dictate that she fear him. He had been haunting her nightmares but she did not want to be alone. The nightmares always left her with an ache for human contact. "You don't have to leave."

He stopped but did not turn around.

"I… I had a nightmare. Why couldn't you sleep?"

He exhaled audibly and Hermione watched as he grasped his left arm forearm. "It was nothing…"

He stepped out into the hall and Hermione called out to him. "I know it's hard on you, losing your memories. You're probably not sure of the future…"

He scoffed.

"I do. Because, there's things I can't remember either!"

He turned around faster than she could process his movements and stalked over to her. He leaned over her and his lips pulled back in a sneer.

"Don't think to mock me, girl. I don't need your false sympathies. I am not a lost puppy for you to care for."

Hermione stared back at him. "I never said you were. Believe _me _when I say I did not save you out of a sick want to be berated and belittled. I saved _your _life because it was the right thing to do." He stepped back, seemingly struck dumb by her brazen words. "And I do know what it feels like to lose my memories. There was an incident when I was a little girl, I don't remember much about it other than blackness. I've been in and out of therapy for it, since I was ten years old, and no one has been able to find out what happened or cure my fear of the dark."

They stared at one another for a long while, locked into a strange staring contest.

"Thank you for the unasked for personal history," he replied before he strode away.

OOO

He had not realized he had fallen asleep until the tantalizing smell of cooking meat awoke him. Severus growled low in his throat as he glared at the ceiling.

'_What is that idiot up to now?' _

After rising out of the bed, Severus stormed out of the room and down the hall. The scent of cooking turkey perfumed the air. He was preparing a snide remark when he stopped in the doorway. Hermione was leaning over a cast iron stove, her bushy hair pulled back in a messy tail at the base of her neck. She stirred a boiling pot and wore a frilly pink apron.

It was a simple domestic scene and for some reason it struck him. Oblivious to his presence, Hermione hummed a tuneless song beneath her breath. For one brief moment, he basked in the kind of life that could never have been his. The realization only made him bitterer.

She took another pot of potatoes off the stove and heading towards a sink. Hermione startled when she noticed Severus hovering in the doorway.

"Oh, you're awake," She said as she steadied the pot on the ledge of the sink.

The wisps of imagination were blown away and Severus returned to reality with venom. "What exactly are you doing?"

She did not turn to face him but shook out the last few drops of water from the pot. "I figured we could have a late Christmas dinner."

"Considering our situation don't you think that is a bit wasteful?"

She turned and gave him a glare which could nearly match his own. "Just letting this bird sit in the fridge is equally wasteful. If we cook it now then we'll have meat for days. But if you don't want any you can go hungry."

Severus stared at her as she bustled about the kitchen. No matter how often he put her down, no matter how ungrateful he appeared, she continued to engage him in her futile attempts at friendly gestures.

"Are you going to stand there or are you going to help me?" she asked with hands placed on her hips. He scowled and attempted a reply but she added. "And save me the sarcasm."

He could not stop the twitch at the corner of his lips. She may be an idiot, but she was a persistent idiot. Noticing a cutting board piled with carrots and celery, he went to work without instruction.

It was sometime after a long stretch of silent cooperation that Hermione glanced over her shoulder and smiled secretly to herself.

OOO

Dinner was a strange sort of success. It had been nice to cooperate with Severus for once instead of flinging barbs at one another. Perhaps it was the fact that they were stuck here together or maybe it was just because he was so damned disagreeable but she wanted to get along with him. She wanted to crack through this prickly exterior, she wanted to heal him. It was probably an idealized fantasy because she was a young doctor but she couldn't help herself.

Dinner had been quiet but enjoyable. Severus did not say much and when he cleared his plate, he went back to her parent's room, where he had been spending most of his time. In another foolhardy attempt to connect with him, Hermione brought him a serving of York Pudding.

After rapping lightly on the bedroom door, Hermione let her eyes trail around the room. The candle on the desk nearby flickered and the wind howling outside caused a pair of shutters at the end of the hall to tremble. Hermione made a mental note to reinforce them the next chance she got.

The bedroom door creaked open and Severus filled the entry way, typical glower in place.

"I brought you desert."

Severus stared down at the platter. "Am I expected to take this?"

Hermione bit back a smart retort; it never led anywhere positive. The goal was to get along not start another row. "I thought you might like some." She extended her arm towards him.

He continued to stare at it like a foreign object.

Hermione internally sighed. Now, even after they had made so much progress?

Suddenly, the shutters at the end of the hall gave way send a gust of freezing wind down the hall. Startled, Hermione screamed throwing the pudding and lurching forward as the pair of them were enveloped in darkness.

Her breath hitched and her heart raced. The darkness crept, preparing to swallow her whole but a steady rhythm kept her grounded.

"Do you think you can get off of me?"

She could not form words. The only thing keep her from slipping into madness was focusing on Severus's beating heart. She balled her hands around his shirt as he tried to pry her of him.

"Please don't," she squeaked.

He sighed and shifted beneath her grasp. "I cannot relight the candle if you won't let go."

She shook her head and buried her face into his chest. He had a surprisingly pleasant scent, something like herbs. He grumbled but wrapped his arm around the small of her back. Under normal circumstances, she would have felt uncomfortable being this intimate with a man she barely knew but his presence was the only thing keeping her in reality and not tormented by more of her nightmares.

He stepped backwards and led her into the room. He did not let her go, even as he helped her sit on the edge of the bed. He sat beside her and she laid her head against him. He wrapped another hesitant arm around her shoulder.

"How long do these episodes last?"

She was reluctant to admit she was beginning to feel better already. _Why don't I fear him? Something about him just feels right. _Hermione sat up straight.

"I'm starting to feel better actually, thank you."

To her further surprise, he did not immediately chase her away but went about the room lighting candles and even ventured out into the hall to secure the shutters. When he came back, he kept a distance between them as if afraid she would pull him down onto the bed for a tussle. Hermione's cheeks burned crimson at the thought.

"Do you have these attacks often." He asked with arms folded over his chest.

"I haven't had one in a while, until recently. I've been taking medication to help me cope with my anxiety."

"I see."

Hermione fiddled with the hem of the blanket. She wanted to press the open dialogue if they were sharing perhaps he would be willing to open up.

"I-"

"You should leave now if you're feeling better."

Hermione clamped her mouth shut and stood to walk away. "Oh alright… well if you want any desert." She glanced over at the destroyed York pudding. "There's more in the kitchen."

He did not answer but closed the door.

OOO

Alone again, Severus walked over to the bed but did not sit down. Her scent still filled his nostrils and invaded his clothing. _Persistent, idiot girl. Why do I even bother? _He rubbed the spot on his arm where the mark had burned before. _Because I am sure, she has something to do with me. But what?_

A/N: After a year-long hiatus, I'm back to continue this tale. I plan on finishing this ambling tale and many others that I've left abandoned for far too long. But because I have limited time and several stories to finish, I need some encouragement. If you would like to see this story continue, drop a review, favorite or put it on alert so I know I have readers who want to see it completed. Regardless this story will be finished but feedback charges my batteries and encourages me to wake up early in the morning to write before work. :D


	9. Chapter 9

White surrounded him. An endless landscape of white and gray nothingness suffocated him. He choked on the isolation, once welcome, now a prison. He was no one he had nothing.

Snow fell from the gray sky. It landed on his clothes melting and dampening his coat. Snow crunched beneath his feet as he wandered through the endless world of white. There was no escape. Nothing changed in three different directions just the yawning expanse of white.

He turned back towards the cabin. Smoke trickled from the chimney before it blended with the gray sky. _It appears I have no choice but to stay here. _

He trudged back towards the cabin, his feet sinking in the snow periodically. Perhaps a good sign, if the snow was this soft maybe they would be free of this damned cabin soon.

_And then what? _What remained for him, without memories, without purpose? He shoved his fingers into his pockets and increased his pace. _No matter… _He stopped midstride when he felt a smooth wooden shaft in his coat pocket.

He extracted it and examined it. His fingertips tingled and the sensation travelled down to his toes.

"Severus, there you are!" Hermione emerged from around the side of the cabin. Her cheeks were rosy from the cold and she hefted a load of wood. "I thought you'd run off on me." She smiled but he did not return the gesture. Her smile faltered but only slightly.

"I required some solitude."

Hermione glanced past him to the snow covered scenery. "Well you can find plenty of it out there." She readjusted the wood in her arms. "Can you help me out, I want to get as much in the house before the snow buries it all."

A curt nod was his only reply. He shoved the strange object back in his pocket, intent on examining it later.

OOO

Pages rustled as a man turned a page of the _Daily Prophet. _Behind him loomed a board filling an entire twenty-foot-high wall. It depicted a map of all of the United Kingdom and across glowing green lights were scattered, they shifted across the board as if they were a mass of glowing green ants. Faint green light illuminated the article he read entitled 'A Day in the Life of The Emperor'. He rested his feet on top of a crate and leaned back in his desk chair.

One light isolated in the middle of Scottish Highlands change from green to a pale pink. The man, who was in charge of monitoring the board, did not notice the shift in color of said dot and continued reading his article.

A woman with a severe bun and square glasses walked in.

"Henrick, what are you doing?"

The man, Henrick, startled. He jumped up and in an attempt to hide his sloth, he attempted to stow away his paper but his feet caught on the crate and he tumbled to the ground.

The woman walked over to him and stood over him, as he lay sprawled on his back. "Care to explain why you're reading while a class 5 alert is in progress?"

He rolled over and crawled over the console at the base of the map.

"Wha' you mean class 5. There hasn't been any activity all day, I swear."

The woman raised a sarcastic brow and pointed to the glowing pink orb. The man stared at it as if he had never seen such a thing before. Then turned to the woman.

"Minerva, I swear to you I only took my eyes off it for a second."

"Regardless, your oversight will be going into my report. Now which one is it, can you do that much at least?"

The man flinched as if struck. He stood up, pulled a cone shaped object off the console, and spoke into it.

"Identify Sector S, Quadrant 88, Class Five alert."

"Magic sensed around subject Q.586720."

"Bring me file on subject Q.586720." Minerva requested crisply.

A file cabinet across the room slid open and a file floated out and landed neatly in her hand. She opened it and read silently. Henrick meanwhile watched the board intently as if searching for more alerts, though with the new program it was hardly a problem anymore. Actually, he was concerned his job may be eliminated, if the whispers were true about the new project they were perfecting in the Department of Mysteries.

"It's one of our High Risk subjects, muggle name: Hermione Granger. Retrieval may be necessary. Keep a _vigilant _watch on subject Q.586720."

"Yes, Minerva." He nodded and turned back to the board. He did not see Minerva placed the folder under her cloak before she strode out.

OOO

Hermione stared across the crisp white landscape. It stretched on forever it seemed. Even the tops of the trees were struggling to make it through some of the larger snow banks. She kicked at a nearby pile, the last trace of her car.

_When will the plow come? Are mom and dad worried about me? Will they send a rescue team? How do I even begin to explain Severus? _

Hermione took a deep breath, the cold air bit at her lungs but felt cleansing. The inside of the house was getting stifling. Things between her and Severus had been _tense _since the night before. She knew he preferred to avoid being touch and yet she had clung to him like a child. _He must think me daft. _

The snow swirled around her and caught in her hair sprinkling it with flakes. She shivered beneath her parka and resolved to head back inside before she caught pneumonia, which was the last thing she needed on top of everything else.

She stepped inside, shook the snow of her boots, and hung up her parka.

"Severus, what are you in the mood for lunch?" She called.

There was no answer. She padded down the hallway and into the living room. Severus sat by the fire and in his hand was the stick she had seen him clutching the night she found him.

"I've been meaning to ask—"That's all she could manage because he looked up at her and their eyes met.

Pain seared through her skull. It felt as if her head would burst open. There was a sensation as if someone was sifting through her brain, no not sifting clamoring carelessly through her memories. She saw snatches of her own memories like pages in a photo book. Birthday parties, dentist appointments, learning to ride a bike and then they became more specific.

She saw herself as a little girl. She lay on her belly on the floor reading a book, the pages turned but she was not touching them. Years later she was running ahead of her parents as the London Zoo, she was excited to see the otters but she tripped over her Mary Janes. She tumbled and should have fallen to the ground but instead of falling flat, she levitated over the ground a few inches before falling gently to the ground.

Then finally _that _day. A group of children gathered around her chanting.

"Bushy wabbit, Hermione is a Bushy Wabbit."

Across from her, Billy Weston led the cheers.

"Stop it, it's not funny," She said through her tears.

He continued his mocking chant, even adding downward forked fingers to represent her bucked teeth.

She was so angry, angrier than she had ever been. There was a pop like gunshot and Billy fell over. She leaned over him, he was unconscious but protruding from beneath, his lips were a pair of exaggerated buckteeth.

"Hermione killed him!"

"What did you do, Rabbit freak!"

Then they appeared, half a dozen men all in black. The surrounded her and the other children. She ran. They had appeared out of nowhere. She couldn't get far because she fell to the ground her legs glued together. She tried to crawl, her fingers clawed into the asphalt but escape was futile. A figure loomed over her and she looked up into those endless dark eyes.

Eyes she knew. Severus's eyes.

That was when everything normally went black, but no longer. The room swam back into view and Hermione saw Severus had risen to his feet.

She fell to her knees. Her legs were unable to support her. He walked towards her his stick… no wand, held out in front of him.

"It was you," She said just before she lost consciousness.

**A/N: I would like to start of by saying thank you all for the warm reception to my return to this story. It has been very motivating and I've been itching to sit down and write ever since the reviews started pouring in. (At one point I almost felt like that scene in The Sorcerer's Stone with the mail pouring out of the mail flap.) I wish I had time to reply everyone to all of your wonderful reviews but alas, my time is limited. But thank you all for review, favoriting, following and above all reading. It does my heart good and I cannot wait to share the next installment with you. Don't forget to leave a review and let me know what you think, it really motivates me to write. :D**


	10. Chapter 10

Hermione woke with a start. Her heart hammered in her chest and she whipped her head around the room. Benign cottage trappings stared back at her. She balled the quilt in her fist as she tried to ease the overwhelming anxiety building inside her.

_Where am I? Who am I? _

She breathed raggedly for several seconds before logic superseded panic. She repeated a litany of facts to calm herself. _I am Hermione Granger. I am a medical student. I love reading and the scent of fresh cut grass… I am trapped in a cabin, in the middle of the Scottish highlands, with a man who wiped my memories as a child… using… magic._

The panic was overwhelming and a sob escaped her throat. Hermione rolled over onto her side and curled her legs up into a ball next to her chest. Cries shook her body as she once more lost control of her reasoning. The image of Severus standing over her, cruel smile in place, as he waved his stick—wand—and trapped her in never ending darkness, played repeatedly in her mind. There was no escape.

OOO

Severus leaned against the door of Hermione's rooms. Her cries washed over him and he could do nothing for her. The best he could manage was putting her in her room where she could not hurt herself while she rode out the attack. It was his fault. He had damaged her. He had taken her past and left her broken. Then like an unwitting fool, he had dredged it back up and reopened the wound.

_What kind of monster am I? _

It had become readily apparent that he could do nothing but destroy. Perhaps it would be best if he left her now. The plow would be around in a day or two and then she would be back with her family, where she belonged. He could slip off and never bother her again.

_You cannot even do that for her, you coward. _

He balled his hand into a fist. If he were any kind of man, he would leave now before he damaged her further, but he could not. As if an invisible thread bound them together, he knew he could not leave her, not like this. Not after everything she had done for him.

Reluctantly, he recalled the previous night. How he had held her and she seemed eased by it. Though the idea of physical intimacy was repellent to him, he knew what he had to do.

His hand found the doorknob and he turned it. Her terrified cries slapped him in the face, a cruel reminder of the damage he had unknowingly done. Once more, the thought that he had no idea _who _he was and _what _he had done overwhelmed him.

He stopped at the foot of her bed. She lay curled in a tight ball as if to protect herself from harm. He reached out a hand to touch her but quickly withdrew it. How did one go about comforting another person? The concept felt alien to him. He should be quick about it before she saw him and really lost control.

Severus sank down on the edge of the bed. She took no notice of him as he reached out and placed a hand on her shoulder. She stiffened as his touch but otherwise seemed unaware of his presence.

_What now? _

There was no immediate change so he changed tact. He would need a more aggressive approach. He sighed heavily. _I cannot believe I am even considering this. _Her terrified shrieks proved the argument irrelevant however. He eased further on the bed and lied down beside her. He could feel the rapid rise and fall of her breath and hear the frightened pace of her beating heart. Though every cell in his body opposed the notion, he wrapped his arm around her. Her entire body went rigid before easing into him, forming with his. He loathed admitting how _right _it felt.

Her breathing steadied and her heartbeat dulled to a regular rhythm until he was certain she had calmed.

It felt necessary to say something, anything really, but what could he say? _Sorry I took away your memories and ironically have no recollection of it. _His mouth twisted at the thought.

The sweet scent of her hair filled his nostrils and she wriggled her backside into him. HHHe took a deep breath and suppressed his body's inconvenient reactions.

_How can she go from stark raving mad one moment to docile the next? _

She had though, the attack seemed to have passed and she was sleep. He pulled away and attempted to leave.

She pulled his arm around her as if to wrap up in him. "Don't," she muttered.

He sighed and eased back onto the bed. It was going to be a long night.

OOO

She dreamed of clouds and a large bed with a quilt big enough for two. She felt safe and secure. Hermione's eyes fluttered open and light shifted through the shutters to fall on her sleep heavy eyes. She wriggled and her hip bumped something solid. She turned her head very slowly to the side. Severus lied beside her. She jumped from bed and skittered back towards the wall.

She choked on a scream unable to escape. She watched him lying there. Helpless. Harmless.

_Just like the day I found him. _

Her heart raced for a moment but the attack had subsided and she was once more in a right state of mind. Unfortunately, her temporary madness had ceased and left her with the full realization that she had been sleeping in the same bed as Severus. A hot blush crept up her neck and Hermione turned away to look out the crack in the window.

Severus stirred and Hermione felt the burning blush intensify.

"What are you doing?" He asked in a contemptuous tone. She almost smiled to hear his prickly voice but the image of him and his—whatever it was—looming over her halted her smile. Just because he had comforted her and slept in the same bed as her did not change the fact that he was the reason for her nightmares.

"We need to talk," she said ignoring his questions. She would need to say this now before she cracked up entirely.

"It would appear that way." He stood and stalked over to the door. He seemed unruffled by the fact that they had woken in such an intimate position. "I'll let you freshen up, then meet me in the living room."

"Sure." She squeaked. The fire in her had diminished and she could not even bring herself to look at him.

She listened as the door swung open and he strode down the hall. She let out the breath she had been holding before going over to the bed. She sat down, and stared at the place where Severus had lied next to her. She remembered snatches of her panic, but most clearly she could remember how the same man that caused her nightmares had been her sole comfort, again.

_I have gone mad. _She sighed.

OOO

A few minutes later, Hermione joined Severus in the living room. He sat staring into the dying embers of a fire. Hermione internally fussed thinking to head out to gather more wood to build up the fire. He looked up at her and his dark gaze captured her. She changed her mind and walked over to the sofa across from him.

He did not speak right away but merely watched her as if assessing.

She chose to speak first. "What do you have to do with my childhood, what were you doing that day and what did you do to me?"

He slid his gaze over her and back to the fireplace. "I don't know."

"That's not good enough, and you know it. Severus, you looked into my mind and extracted things years of therapy only scratched the surface of. Who are you? What are you…?"

He was silent for a long while.

"Severus, please, I want to trust you."

"Don't you think I want to know myself? Don't you think I would love to be able to make sense out of all of this? You are a selfish girl. Have you already forgotten how you found me? It's not all about you, Ms. Granger."

The comment stung but it was something she had begun to expect from Severus. _Has it really only been a couple of days? _

Her eyes flickered to the coffee table where his—wand—or whatever it was lied seemingly harmless.

She stood and leaned over the table but did not touch it.

"I have theories, you used this—" she motioned to the wand. "To take my memories away. It seems daft but I think it was magic. I mean, I saw myself doing things that defy logic. That day when I gave Billy buckteeth. I was thinking, if only he had buckteeth, he wouldn't make fun of me… and then it happened. And you showed up." Her eyes flickered up towards him.

"Are you suggesting we're magicians?"

Hermione retracted her hand and then drug her nails across her scalp. "I don't know. All I know is what you did to me… earlier. It defies everything I know and if magic is real… then this may be a _wand. _And if it's a wand and I am… some sort of _magician_, then maybe I can use to extract your memories the way you did to me."

He stared at the tabletop, seemingly in thought. Hermione kneeled beside it. It was quite possibly the daftest plan she had ever concocted, but she was desperate to know more and maybe… just maybe if she could help Severus recall his memories she could prove what had happened that day was an accident… _I do not want to believe he is bad. _

"And what if you drive me insane?" he asked. Had it been anyone else, the question would have seemed comical, but this was Severus and she knew he was serious.

She swallowed hard. "It's up to you, is it worth the risk to get your memories back?"

He glared at her and then looked back at the wand.

"I don't know if 'me' is someone I want to be," he said it so quietly, Hermione was not sure she should respond.

"It's up to you."

He folded his hands on his lap. "Let's do it, but if anything goes wrong. I want you to end it."

He did not elaborate and Hermione was afraid to ask him to clarify.

She placed her hands on the table, one of each side of the wand. "Should I just grab it?"

"That would be a good place to start."

Hermione took a deep breath and grasped the smooth shaft. Tingles shot up and down her arm. There was a familiar feeling, a sense of right.

"What now?"

"Before, we made eye contact."

Hermione met his gaze. Nothing.

"Maybe I'm doing it wrong? Did you think something or do something?"

"That's all I did."

She was starting to feel discouraged. Had all the hype been for nothing? Perhaps it had been a coincidence. How could they have shared the vision?

"I know maybe I'm supposed to wave it or something." She did so as she spoke and sparks flashed out the end of the wand, pinks, purples and greens filled the room like a tiny firework display. Hermione dropped the wand, which fell to the table with a clatter.

"Not the desired effect—"

An engine backfired—but that was impossible they were in the middle of nowhere— Hermione Jumped to her feet, as did Severus. She was making her way to the window, when a voice stopped her.

"Subject Q.586720, you are in breach of ministry code: Alpha, Zeta, seven-thousand and eight dash ten, you are hereby to be extracted from the muggle world and taken into ministry custody." Hermione twirled around, a woman with a severe bun and square glasses stood in the doorway.

"How did you get in here who are you?"

The woman did not seem to notice her.

"Severus? What are you doing here? They said… I thought…"

"Severus, do you know this woman?"

Severus stared at the woman, not speaking, just staring as if he was trying to work out a word problem.

"Subject Q.586720, stand down or I'll be forced to subdue you with force."

"You know me?" Severus asked.

"Of course, Sir, you're head of the false-magic suppression unit."

Severus' expression twisted as if he had a stomachache. "You don't remember… Potter… of course. I'll need to subdue the girl and then transport you to St. Mungo's."

"You'll do no such thing!" Hermione shouted. "Severus, what's going—"

She did not get the chance to finish because the woman raised her wand and shouted, "Stupefy."

Hermione saw Severus's face swim in her vision before everything went black once more.

**A/N: Dear readers, thank you for your amazing feedback and love. I enjoy everyone's speculation and commentary it's one of the things I love most about writing fanfiction. I'm absolutely floored by the amount of people reading this story and reviewing. I cannot think of any story I have written before that had nearly 100 reviews by chapter ten. And seeing as this **_**is **_**chapter ten I'd be absolutely amazed if we could hit 100! So feel free to review. The more I get the more motivated I am and maybe with proper motivation I can crank out the next chapter before next weekend. ;) That's all for now darlings. **


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